Bullet point post time:
*I think that I may need to start linking people on my sidebar again. I feel like you might feel neglected because I’ve never really set this site up. I know that my IVP folks have kept along with me and there are bunches of new hits but you know I’d love to show link love. That could be a weekend project. Though, now that I’ve said it, I’m sure I will fail at this. Shocker.
*Laptop burglary sting on the hill. My house didn’t escape. Bad news, bye bye macbook. Good news, insurance, new locks, deadbolt, and macbook pro.
*Fall is here and I need new clothes because nothing fits. This is a good thing. I am now a Mens M and sometimes S in sweaters. Neat.
*I haven’t been to the gym for a hard workout in two weeks. I have walked a zillion miles with Casco but I need to start doing more again. Must find time.
*I have the worlds best dog. Seriously. When the vet found out that I’d adopted her from a shelter he said “you hit the shelter dog jackpot.” She’s that good. LOVES kids, especially 2 y/o A, who likes to “walk” her around the house. Loves dogs, especially M, the dog of my dog walker. Yes, I have a dog walker. On my long work days Casco gets a long mid-day walk, or an excursion to run at the park. She needs this kind of exercize or else, well, it’s noticable. Not in a bad way or anything but she’s way more hyped up if she’s not given a run. She also can fetch, knows her name, and comes with a whistle call, or her name. We have just about perfected “sit.” I am completely in love with this dog. Proof:
*I’m also in love with a girl. Things continue to be very very sweet with noname. I need to get over this noname bs soon. I’ll find something that fits, soon. I admit that I’m a little sad that I don’t get to sleep at her house anymore because of Casco, and sometimes it’s hard for her to stay at my house. Things will work out in time, and neither one of us wants to force anything but the truth is, I miss her when she’s not around.
*Work continues to be work. Things are still pretty good, but I find it harder to be enthusiastic about the work I’m doing. I mean, I love the people I work with and g-d knows I love the money. But I’m just not so fond of the “work” part of it anymore. We’ll see.
*Speaking of money – this is the first month since we broke up where I’m actually going to….stretch to make ends meet. I mean, there were about $2000 of weird expenses (deductable for new laptop, broken tooth, etc) and Casco set up wasn’t cheap but it was do-able. I’m just thankful that well, I have good credit. I just wanted to get more out of debt, not further in it. It’ll be ok, bonus time is coming up as is tax time, and things will get more even keeled in the financial sector of life.
*I’m becoming better friends with two beautiful women who I don’t think in a million years I would have pegged as people I would be close with. They have strongish connections to S and A, though perhaps slightly less these days, and were, for me, in my mind, most certainly in the “lost friend” camp after the break up. But time passes and both of them have offered me great clarity and insight into a lot of things I never considered before, and I think that they’ve both gotten to know the me that I haven’t really been for a long time. I value them both so much – and they are GREAT advice givers. For serious. We’re smashing the stereotype that butches and femmes can’t just be friends and, honestly? I’m love love loving them both so much. Life is way more fun with both of them in mine.
*I have a doppleganger. She lives in a state about 1000 miles away. She kind of looks like me and thinks like me and likes the same music I do. She also has a connection to past people but, fuckit if I haven’t found someone to be friends with who makes me laugh, points out the obvious when I can’t see it, and is happy for my successes and happiness. She makes my days go by much much better-er. Really, there’d be a big big void if she suddenly dissapeared. Or got a job that didn’t allow for chat slackerdom.
*I worry that my happiness isn’t real, that I can’t quite be having as good of a time with life as I am, that a shoe is going to drop and things are going to return to the pit of despair. This is what I’m working most on these days. I’m working on seeing if I can get off the anti-d’s. I’m still working to create a family. I’m still working on strengthening the family I already have. I’m still….really trying and struggling with the feeling like I might not be trying hard enough. Perhaps I’m not, and perhaps I’m not quite in a place where I can just lighten up on myself.
*I am in love with the West Wing. I’ve listened to my sister talk about this show for a year. I’ve listened to noname talk about this show since we started dating. I finally started watching season 1. OMG. SO freaking good. And Stockard Channing. If either of them told me she was on the show I would have started a long time ago.
There you go. This kind of post is what happens when I feel guilty for not posting. I’ll try to be better-er. Really.