Archive for October, 2006


Gigantor Attacks!!

October 30, 2006

Tonight I finally carved up Gigantor.


I had a great time doing this. It took about 4 hours or so….and was very challenging. Carving a pumpkin like this was different than anything else I’ve ever done, and I can’t wait till next year, as I’m a little bit more comfortable with using this slightly unorthodox medium.

I decided to make him into a Raven, perfect for Halloween, but switched it up a bit and carved it in the style of the native peoples of the Pacific Northwest.


Gigantor in the light

The only not so good part was the pumkin carnage I created in the dining room, that I had to clean up before S got home.

Pumpkin Carnage


Mo’ Brita Blues

October 30, 2006

It was a shockingly wet weekend, in more ways than one. If you’ve watched a weather report in the last 48 hours, you’ll know that the Northeast portion of the USA was bombarded by heavy rains and winds this weekend – my neighborhood was hit pretty hard, though, surprisingly, we never lost power.

At my house, the waterworks started Wednesday, when S accidentally knocked our Brita water pitcher off of the counter and on to the kitchen floor, where it shattered into a bunch of pieces as it broke. It was ok though, because the pitcher was 3 years old and was getting a little scuzzy, and also, the kitchen floor really needed the mopping it got.

S was pissed at herself but we shook it off, and bought a new pitcher this weekend. It had been in the fridge for less than 24 hours when somehow when going to retrieve it last night it “slipped” out of S’s hands and uh, on to the kitchen floor where it shattered into a bunch of pieces as it broke. She was beyond pissed this time but I calmly (actually, somewhat out of character for me, but I’m pleased with my non pissy reaction, especially because mood-wise, I was having a particularly awful day) grabbed the mop, cleaned up the mess, and then drove us to Target to buy a new (new) Brita. Which we did.

Would you believe it if I told you that when I opened the box when I got home, that motherfucker was broken too??? Shieeet.


Have Learned….

October 27, 2006

…that artichokes are perhaps best eaten at home, and not at ones desk.


It’s Not Your Brain, It’s Just the Flame

October 27, 2006

Another Friday has been reached. Hallelujah! It’s been a pretty weird past few days in my neck of the woods. I’ve got an…Unexpected house guest taking up residence on my couch, which has been interesting, but not particularly bad.

Also, this weekend, the city of Portland plays host to Interpride. They are having their yearly conference this weekend, and there has been a huge influx of “new gay” for the weekend, which was kind of fun to watch last night. Yes, it’s true. S and I ventured out on a school night to play in Portland’s seedy gay underground. Ok, not so seedy. But it was funny….all these people from MUCH bigger cities from all over the world walking in and taking in “Maine Gay,” which is certainly not…..”Metropolitan gay” in any way shape or form. But you know, it’s a pretty tight community and it works for Maine. I hope that our out of town visitors forgive some of “our” slowness to catch up to “cool,” and focus instead on how nice and hospitable we are. So, please, be nice and hospitable to the visiting gay? Uhm, I….ahem…know that SOME of you were VERY hospitable to our guests. I think my only words can be….keep up the good work? Yeah:)

I should also admit that our going out last night was partially in hopes of bumping into Joe.My.God who is hands down, my favorite queer blogger, and maybe my own personal celebrity crush. When I was telling some of my friends who work with Interpride this, they kind of laughed at me because 1) They didn’t know that he was “famous,” and 2) I’m star struck over him. Seriously, you could put…I dunno, Brad, Angelina, and Joe in a room together, and the only person I’d want to talk to would be Joe. There’s a whole weekend of possibility ahead of me to meet him, so….that’s kind of nice to look forward too. I mean, I know where they’re all staying and stuff but seriously, stalker isn’t my m.o. so….that won’t be an option:)

Also, this weekend is packed with activity. PACKED I tell you. Not only do I need to carve up “Gigantor,” we’re going to two parties, one of which is a costume party. S and I will be going as “Good N Plenty.” S will be pink/good….and yeah, I’ll be plenty. Ha. Should be a good time.


Who Says You Can’t Go Home

October 25, 2006

Its rare that I get to say this, but today, I am very happy to be a Jersey girl.

Way to go.


An Open Letter

October 25, 2006

Dear Hewlett-Packard Company,

I am writing to let you know just how much it pisses me off when I have to change the ink cartridge in my printer.

The first thing that pisses me off is your new packaging. It seems to be made of some indestructible, untearable, thin plastic board that is glued together with industrial strength Krazy Glue. What the shit is this? I mean, the packages are small enough to steal w/o breaking into the tough outer layer, and seriously, I’d have better luck doing a smash and grab at Tiffany and Co. than trying to open up one of your ink cartridge containers in a Staples and make a run for it. Every time I need a new cartridge I have to go searching for scissors (which disappear a lot in shared office space) or practically hack off my hand when trying to open the package with a letter opener. Please change back to regular, recyclable cardboard. Please.

Secondly. Don’t think this “aligning” bullshit fools us. The amount of ink your printers use to “align” the print heads is more than I use in a day. I think you’re taking advantage of us. There must be a better way of doing this, rather than wasting a boatload of ink every single time.

Thank you for your time,

j, a slave to your inky goodness


Slooooooow Cooked

October 23, 2006

S and I got home from work around 5 ish on Friday afternoon. It was howling and pouring outside. We got in the house, stripped, and hopped into bed. Don’t get dirty thoughts, nothing happened. We laid there for about an hour, just asking each other “so, what are we having for dinner?” over and over again. Normally, we’d go out on a Friday night. But S’s new job pays only once per month, and we’ve not adjusted to this schedule yet – plus, she’s not been paid in three weeks! In addition, I missed some work because of the pneumonia bout…so it’s been a little tight, and we just wanted to make sure we’d have enough cash for our mini-break to NYC next month and for any small emergencies that pop up. I mean…we could always use credit but then…I feel guilty about it, so it’s better for us to spend what we have. Anyway.

After debating dinner for all this time, we’d pretty much decided on spaghetti, but neither of us were really happy with this choice. Finally, S said, “ok, word association time. When I say this word, you tell me what pops into your head….ok…Dinner!” And I replied, “oh, stew that’s been cooking in a crock pot all day!” “Not likely, she said.” I was crushed. But said…”Get up! Lets go!” We ventured out into the still howling, windy, rain storm.

Target had like 5 different crock pots. We chose a simple, 4 quart model. We also bought some of the new berry Rice Krispies (so good) for treat making. By now it’s about 8:30. And we still haven’t eaten dinner. But we’ve spent $30 dollars already. And S is about to eat her hand. So….Chili’s is close. We fought (and and won) the urge to have ribs and other really bad things, settling for two salads. Which meant that dinner was only $20. Then we went shopping for stew ingredients. Another $10.

We SO should have had spaghetti. But…..the stew (and the krispie treats) were SO SO good.


Please note the fire extinguisher. Do you have one, readily available in your kitchen? If not, get one. If you do have one, have you “checked” it lately? Really, go now. Check it out. Safety first!!!
I’m excited about the crock pot. I want your one pot meal recipes!!! Also, speaking of recipes….Many of you have been asking for the ginger-apple pie recipe. It will be posted at PhoodAdventures soon. Hold tight!


More Fall, and the Biggest Pumpkin Ever!

October 21, 2006

See. I really did get my hand stuck in a pumpkin.


Today, after having lunch with the lovely E, her wife J, and (adorable, gets bigger every time we see him) son J, we went to a not too far away farm, so that I could find another pumpkin to carve, so I had one to display for Halloween. They had MANY pumpkins, and squashes, and pretty gourds, like this one:

Dirty Gourd

after much looking, I found the perfect HUGE pumpkin. Remember, safety first!

Safety First

Seriously, this thing is huge.

It's Really Big

S thinks that I may have a problem, and my mother thinks that I am headed for the sanatorium. And I may have a slight pumpkin carving addiction, but hey, the “season” is over next week, and I’m enjoying myself.

So….Any ideas as to what I should carve this beast in to? I’m going to do it next weekend…If I get enough good suggestions, perhaps I will set up a poll, and you, my faithful readers, can vote on what the pumpkin that shall be known as Gigantor should be turned in to!


Cuts a Straight Line Down Through The Heart

October 21, 2006

I’m going to post twice today, and this isn’t the happy, funny one. If you’re looking for happy/funny, click to the next post. Seriously. Yesterday was one of those days. You know, as my friend A would say, a “fuck you, you fucking fuck” to everything kind of day. I’m sick of so much stupid crap that it’s not even funny.

I’m sick of stupid people who own gray cars who on a gray, windy, rainy day don’t put their headlights on.

I’m sick of stupid people who keep their small children unrestrained in the back seats of their cars, speeding down the road.

I’m sick of same stupid person keeping his window open about 1/2 an inch – just enough to tap the ash from his cigarette out but keep the rain from coming into the car, but also keeping the smoke in for his two unrestrained children to breathe too.

I’m sick of stupid pregnant teenagers wearing flip-flops and tank tops outside in a serious rainstorm in 40 degree weather.

I’m sick of sobbing hysterically after we make love.

I’m sick of having something we do so so well not do what we really want it to.

I’m sick of having my wife be sad during all of this, because she can’t do anything about it, and wants it as bad as I do.

I’m sick of not having what I really really want.

“…But I could swear by your expression, that the pain down in your soul was the same as the one down in mine…”


The Worst Thing…

October 19, 2006

…about being a queer TCC’r with limited funds? Knowing that you’re ovulating (right now!!) and also knowing there’s nothing you can do about it.

TCC friends, what’s your “worst thing?”

*Edit* To avoid confusion, and to not hurt the straight friends who are having troubles, I want to point out that I pulled the queer card because for many straight couples, each new month brings them a “free” try. Yes, I know, not so the case for male factor friends, or known infertility issues, or singletons, but in the “just trying” group….anyway, I think you know what I’m saying. I just don’t want to be insensitive in my anger.