Archive for the ‘Love’ Category


Protected: Protected: and if I seem a little strange, well that’s because i am

November 9, 2008

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thats the impression that i get

October 30, 2008

The other night, influenced by us going to see “Nights in Rodanthe,” we rented “The Notebook,” a movie which neither of us had ever seen but one of my (incredibly masculine guy-guy) co workers said was “one of the best movies ever.”  I don’t know if I’d take it that far but it was a very very sweet and sad movie which we both enjoyed quite a bit.

When we were curled up in bed afterwards, I looked and S and said, “when you’re old and senile I will read to you. I’ll even read the fantasy books with dragons on the covers.” S kissed my head and smiled and said, “And I will read…..hrm…what would you want me to read to you?”

We kind of looked at each other for a second and at the same time said, “porn.”

Yes, things are nicely on the road to normal.


Waterfire weekend

August 18, 2008

Ok, well not a whole weekend. But on Saturday evening S, A, and I journeyed two hours south to the beautiful little city of Providence, RI, for the annual Waterfire event, where numerous bonfires are placed along the Providence river and lit for all to enjoy. There was music and street food and drinking in public and a really good time.

I hadn’t visited Providence since the mid/late Nineties and honestly, the city was sort of a shithole at that point in time. It has seriously undergone some huge turn around because it was clean and well lit and beautiful.  I could see myself living in a small city like that – somewhat bigger than Portland, with a “real” mall, and lots of college students to keep things interesting.  It was fun because A had worked at one of those colleges not too long ago and it was interesting when she bumped into people (like campus safety officers) who still called her out by name – and it was nice to have a knowledgeable guide to the town.

Can I mention again how much I loved the mall? No, we didn’t spend a tremendous amount of time there, just money. Have I ever mentioned how Nordstrom is perhaps the only retail store that S REALLLLY loves shopping at? I mean, she loves shopping but she REALLLLY loves Nordstrom and their “personal shoppers,” who make perfectly sized garments appear if by magic in the dressing rooms.

That’s not to say that I didn’t have my fun too – I dropped some change at Dave and Busters, one of my favorite places.  Both of the other members of my entourage quickly realized that taking me somewhere real to gamble is probably not a good idea – my favorite thing is dropping the coins into the games that push other coins over the ledge….I could sit there forever blowing money away like that.  It was awesome – well, except for the one moment when I realized that my brother, sister, and I went to a DnB the night my dad died – I hadn’t remembered it until I was actually there, about to get some coinage off my power card.

After playtime we headed back up the hill to wander some more, eat some food, and um, then S decided that she was going to get pierced below the neck (I’m not going to say where, but I’ll say she only got one of them done though she was born with two) and though she’d talked about it a few times recently it was still the most spontaneous thing I’ve ever seen her do. Yay S. Way to let loose. I can’t always be the crazy one and it’s nice to have you join me for the ride.

Everything after that was anti-climatic and it was getting on in the day – so we headed home and it was LOVELY driving North – as (you New Englanders will know this well) traffic was backed up from the Hampton tolls all the way through Portsmouth and into Maine. NUTS! I’m glad we were going the other way.

It was nice to get out of town for a little bit, relax, enjoy a newish city, and a really beautiful event that I wish our town had something like. It was also nice for it to not rain for once in the….month.

And: Confidential to all of you who commented on the last post. I love you all very very much and your support is so much appreciated. To answer the questions? Morrissey, yes (but more The Smiths,) 3 pairs of Doc’s, and Queen.



Protected: Protected: how beautiful and modern*

August 14, 2008

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its the little things

July 31, 2008

Yesterday at work, one of my co-workers asked if I’d walk across the two parking lots that separate us from a multiplex and buy him some movie popcorn. I did so, came back, and he shared. It was so delicious that I stopped myself from eating much of it because I KNEW I wanted it for dinner. I looked up what movies were playing and pretty much nothing struck my fancy. And I didn’t want to pay like, $16 dollars for us to see a movie that I didn’t want to see just to spend another $5 bucks to get movie popcorn.

Earlier in the day I’d asked S to pick up a copy of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix – we hadn’t yet owned it, and only saw it once on opening day in the theater, and the new trailer for #6 is out today and well, I wanted to see it again. So I knew it was waiting for me at home. Solution? Bought large bag of movie popcorn on my way home to enjoy in the privacy of my bedroom. Genius point number one.

We both thought the movie popcorn at home experience would be better with some….fresh greens (yes, that was a euphemism,) and well, it was but after we ate the popcorn, we were still hungry and didn’t really have anything else to eat. Lo and behold we get a text message from my sister that say, “open the door.” We do and she shoves a bag of Indian food leftovers (a LOT of leftovers) into S’s hands, says “enjoy,” and leaves. AMAZING.

And then we had freezie pops for desert.

It was an excellent date. Yay for excellent dates.


those crazy kids

July 8, 2008

Honestly, S’s telling of how we met is pretty spot on. I became fascinated by her (and to be fair, her boyfriend at the time as well) at that Glitter Party.  She was beautiful…tall, dark haired, with the sparkliest green eyes imaginable.

As for the first time she met my sister, I remember that too – it was at a party at my friends house that she and her boyfriend and some other of his friends were invited to. At this point they were in the process of breaking up, but they had spent the whole day together at a family event for his sister.  They were both being pretty hard on each other and had spent the event…drinking. And then she didn’t eat dinner. And then she came to this party. And um, drank a bit more.  And then got sick over the porch. It was kind of a memorable introduction to my friends, I think, but they soon forgave her though I still tease her about it now.

As for “crazy” rituals…we don’t have any. Just one small daily moment of the promise of our love. It takes place the moment before we’re really ready to go to sleep. I turn to her and ask, “Will you be here in the morning?” And she replies, “yes,” to which I ask, “promise?” And she says, “I promise.” And then we share a night time kiss and she tells me she loves me and I return the sentiment.

Its pretty much the best part of my day.


what she said

July 7, 2008

I am not forgetting about your questions that I promised to answer. For the “how did you two meet” question, I have employed the help of S, who sums it up pretty well.

How We Met

(S’s Side of the Story)

I had been living in the garden state for about seven months, having moved there for my partner at the times first year of grad school, and my research fellowship with a national LGBT non-profit think tank. I had very few friends in New Jersey, acquaintances from work and the friends of my partner, who had grown up, and attended undergrad, there.

Occasionally, my partner at the time would chat online on a gay social networking site. One night, in mid-January, a dyke in her mid-twenties, also living in northern NJ, was online and they struck up a conversation. Her name was J. Come to find out, we were going to be at the same party she was going to a couple of nights later.

This party, an annual “glitter party” (where everyone must adhere to the theme by wearing something augmented with glitter), hosted by a butch-femme, lesbian couple. The femme of this couple was a faculty member at the college that my partner had gone to for undergrad. The butch of the couple was an assistant manager for the same chain of movie rental stores that J was working for.

I walked into the party that night, prepared for a couple of hours of feeling really socially awkward, until my allergies to their cats got the better of me, and we would call it a night. Instead, I met J and we spent most of the evening chatting up a storm – talking about queer issues, movies, our shared academic background in art history and more. She was great, really cute (with a mixture of hair gel and loose glitter in her bleach-blonde hair), and she listened to me, seeming genuinely interested in what I had to say and what was on my mind.

She had been living back in New Jersey for about six months, following the death of her father, sharing a house with her brother and sister. We became good friends and spent time together over the next few months, more frequently as time went on.

In the early summer, my relationship ended and I needed a place to stay for a few weeks before moving back to Maine. I moved in with J and her siblings, intending to stay for two weeks. The two weeks turned into two months as we became much more than friends. When I finally moved, J moved with me and here we are, still together five years later.

She’s stil cute, the hair is definitely not bleach blond anymore and I’m convinced that sometimes she’s not actually listening to me – but occasionally I find bits of glitter in her hair.


Wedding blog #2

May 23, 2008

So. I’m home, and exhausted, but good.

My brother’s wedding was absolutely beautiful. My Little Prince reading went over very very well, and both E and A were pleased with my selection. The wedding itself took place here, in the Eagle Rock Reservation in NJ, overlooking the Manhattan skyline. The ceremony was sweet as can be, dinner was amazing – punctuating the evening was a fireworks display that occured over lower Manhattan (it might have been Brooklyn even) that we could see from the event room. It was perfect.

A looked stunning, and my brother looked very handsome and together they make a really great looking couple – but better than that? E adores A.

I don’t blog much about family but I’ll give you some background on E. He’s weird. Weird in a good way, but weird. He has always had crazy ADD. He’s tamed it, but it’s taken over 20 years to do so. He’s quirky and sarcastic. He is perhaps the funniest person I know. He’s also a bloody genius and can pretty much fix anything. He put himself through college working as a union electrician. He got a scholarship to law school. He actually graduates tomorrow. We’re all incredibly proud of him.

Did I mention he was quirky? He has slight ocd. He’s germ phobic. We always joked that if E ever was to get with a girl she’d have to arrive in a full body condom if he ever hoped to get laid. He often reads as gay. He makes emphatic hand gestures. He bakes to help him de-stress. He spent the three days before his wedding perfecting cakes – he made the cake for his special day.

And somewhere along the way he met this beautiful girl. This girl who loves him, and for lack of a better word “handles” him really well. She’ll go with his antics and impulsiveness – to a point. She will race up the stairs of a 5 story parking garage to see if they can beat the elevator with him. She puts the hammer down when people are hungry at 9pm and try to get a reservation at the fondue place and he’s like “lets just go to Macy’s and get a fondue pot, and we can make it ourselves,” she reminds him that people are hungry NOW but that maybe they can do that for next time.

SHE’S funny. She gets him. It was hard for us to believe 3 years ago that he actually had a real live girlfriend. It amazed us when he moved in with her. Shocked us when he proposed and she said yes. And now, they’re married, forever. It is completely obvious how much he cares for and about her, and is the sweetest thing.

For the first time in my life, instead of seeing a funny and weird little boy, I saw a confident, strong man profess his love for this one perfect for him woman.

It was one of the best days ever.


this post has been rated G

May 18, 2008

S and I went on an honest to goodness date last night. I mean, we go out a lot, etc, but this seemed to have some formality to it that was very nice. I wasn’t too wiped out from working all day, so we just chilled out at our house until 9 ish, then we walked downtown and saw the movie “Forgetting Sarah Marshall,” which outside of seeing that guy from “How I met your mother” naked (like really REALLY naked) too many times was a good movie. But that’s not what this post is about.

While we were sitting there as the previews started I turned to S and said, “Know what? I could probably watch previews for an hour or so and be fully entertained. Actually, come to think of it, If someone made a 2 hour movie of previews of all my FAVORITE movies ever I would probably be in screen heaven.”

Please tell me I’m not a freak (for this.) S looked at me like I had caught the crazy.


so many things to remember

May 15, 2008

On this day five years ago I told this beautiful girl that I loved her.

Best decision I ever made.